I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I was informed last night that im not allowed to pick up the bouncers and carry them around anymore. Last sat is starting to make more sense
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
Its the least I can do really, I mean, I did sleep with her husband...
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
I was just hotboxing under my sheets and I got lost on the way out.
It was so scary.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
have you ever tried to puke in an automatic flushing toilet? impossible
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
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