I cockslap morals
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
I woke up this morning with a pop tart under my pillow with one bite eaten. Another pop tart was in the floor. No recollection whatsoever. I ate the one under my pillow for breakfast, though.
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
She needs sedatives and a leash
Did you really get 12 corn dogs from the gas station last night?
I have work in an hour and I'm having trouble with concepts such as 'staying upright' and 'staying conscious'. Tie me to your wrist next time we go out drinking,
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
Do you think you could cook pancakes while i blow you?
In honor of the new administration, I'm going to make it my goal this weekend to get some lesbian action. Fuck Donald Trump and fuck Mike Pence. I'm going to be a spiteful gay.
i woke up and couldnt remember who was in my bed and it was so dark.. i rolled over and started kissing him and feeling his face because hey... if the blind can see like that.. maybe i could too
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