We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
the bottle said: caution extremely flammable. so that was my motivation.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I convinced a girl making out is a secret handshake
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
Randomize
