For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
Im gonna need you to always be ready for drinking or this will never work. grow up peter pan.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I decided I was tough enough to wax my bikini area myself. Long story short, I'll be drunk when you get home
Oh ya, I forgot to tell you, last night I woke up to the sound of you peeing on the floor next to the fridge, didn't remember until now. Have fun at Dayton!
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
he sent me a picture of him holding out his pinky so we could pinky promise. i have to fuck him now
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