I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Whoever said that a man can only cum up to 8 times a day is a fucking liar...or was never on adderall
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
He deleted all his profile pics with her. It was like the bat signal for single women everywhere.
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
my mom just left...time to break out that water bottle of wine that I sewed into my teddy bear
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
Randomize
