Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
I just walked into his bathroom to see two poops floating... no toilet paper. WTF!?
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
I want to get laid tonight but my sheets haven't been washed since vomiting in them on Halloween :(
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
I've been up for almost three hours and it took me until JUST NOW to figure out that what I'm tasting isn't blood, just the minerals in the water. Fuck hangovers, man.
Just described you as looking like "a very cute escapee from an Egyptian insane asylum"
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Omg. I meet up with you guys with bodily fluids on my chin ONE time and suddenly I'm a whore.
Randomize
