So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Your dad touched me again.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Ever have a poop and think... that has no business coming out of a human? Like it looks like a sick dog's or a ferral animal's?
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
and after i failed the breathalyzer i said to the cop "i've never been very good at tests"....
red lips, whiskey sips, shaking hips, nipple slips. my life as a rap song.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
She just rubbed her face up and down my six pack cooing. Equal measure of weird and hot.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
i put frozen meatballs in my drink thinking they were ice cubes and I'm vegetarian wtf
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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