You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
Whoa Z and x make the same sound
YOU GOT EVICTED FROM A TRAILER PARK!?!? WTF!!!!!
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
He's upstairs shouting 'FUCK OFF I'M IN MY MOTHERFUCKING ZEN ZONE' out of the window.
Dude, you punched me in the face bc I wasnt ordering your tbell fast enough. Then when you got it, you threw it out the window bc, and I quote, "OBAMACAREEEE!"
We had to take the hinges off the bathroom door. Needless to say, you are no longer welcome at that bar
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
My ex's new girlfriends ex boyfriend is getting me my nipples pierced for Valentine's Day so who's the real winner here
Wow. Ok who would waste Game 7 ticket on kids?!
Poor parenting at its best
My one night stand ended up seeing me the next morning... For my interview. Guess who got a job.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
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