If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
Just taught my suite how to queef. I feel like i'm back in 9th grade!
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
I also woke up on my floor. Naked. On a pile of clothes. With my head in the trash can. And a sheet over me.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Until you have had Country Grammar stuck in your head whilst writing a Supreme Court brief you've never lived.
BILL GATES DONALD TRUMP LET ME IN NOW
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Shame - the story of my life.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
