Small penises have feelings too.
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Why is my drynk life bleeding into my real life
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
Yeah.. I'm sorry I broke your phone. But in my defense you handed me the frying pan.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
I still dont see how i drunkenly impressed your mom
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