I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
Well the nurse forgot to take all my stitches out, so my surgical tools are peroxide, kitchen scissors, fingernail clippers, a pocket knife, and 11 beers. Let's do this...
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
do you think a sharp knife would stab through a cheese suit?
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
I can't believe I ever hated her sister or friends. They got her some sexy sexy ass lingerie for the honeymoon. I think I love them bitches
He was asleep with his head on a windowsill and you were petting his head, then you almost left the kitchen and then went back to pet him some more.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
so.. please tell me you did not really sleep on the washing machine last night
guilty
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