Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
we're making bets on your personal life
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
i'm out of college. that means no more sex on a twin bed. ever. i don't care how big his dick was. i'm classy like that.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Hella random but just hear me out...A bar that is a petting zoo. Bitches love petting zoos.
Seriously, I really just burned my nipple making ravioli.. I'd explain, but no reasoning makes this acceptable:/
Randomize
