I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
i licked icing off his dick. in front of his sister.
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
We're having play-off hate sex for a sport I don't even understand. Go USA!
We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Girl. There is no more toilet paper. You should have seen the twerking I just did to shake the pee off.
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
I am not even ashamed to say it, I got laid in the stairwell of the hotel, by a 29 year old. It was awesome!
Randomize