i just remebered what i did last night, i asked a homeless man on a bike "hey whatcha doin with that bike, wanna make 5 bucks?" he agreed and then rode me on his handle bars a block away to the next bar.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
may or may not have recieved head in the car before we came in.
First straight guy ever blown in a Prius. Congrats.
so the party was at my house but some how i ended up being the only one who slept outside
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
The dumpster is full of naked people swimming. I'm going to join.
Saw a guy throw up on himself while walking, drinking, and singing all at the same time. Hope your night is going better than his :)
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
My mom was looking at curtains for me and sent pictures and I had to be like "not the Disney princess pink and purple, more like an acid trip"
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
Randomize
