You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
In an effort to go green, I just used rainwater to fill my bong.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
I saw seagulls fucking earlier today. What have you done with your life recently?
Got kicked out of the club and woke up at a frat house. Good night? Couldn't tell you. I got a date out of it I'm glad someone thinks my drinking problem is cute.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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