i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
Just tried on my bathing suit for the first time this year. Had to drink a beer to numb the pain.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
Drunk and alone at a magic show is what my life has become without you
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Randomize
