I'm at the point in my career when i know a sites a trap and isn't real porn
I'm pretty sure there was a language barrier but he knew what "harder" meant.
Dude they have your information. Come back. The sheriffs office is here, they are pissed..please come back otherwise jail is inevitable. Call me
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
Eating a popsicle in the shower was the best idea I've had in ages.
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
Some guy offered you 100 bucks last night to suck your toes. I had to drag you away while you were yelling at me, "Stop money cock blocking me!"
That's just where I'm at in my life.
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Already doing pt exercises by picking my margarita up off the night stand. Fuck yeah.
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Shhh embrace your inner whore. Just embrace it.
Randomize
