Is it bad that my booty call's snoring was more interesting than the sex we had last night?
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
His idea of a compliment is: 'you're cuter than your friend. If you both wanted a 3way I'd do it,but I'd pay more attention to you.'
Can I have my ID back now or are you using it to crossdress again?
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
Woke up to the sound of my own moans coming from the tv....evidently it was videotaped.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
The Mole People would help. They are a kind, helpful people, the Mole People are.
Mole people?
Mole people
I'm in my bed. Snow angles in fresh sheets. don't even try to get me out tonight.
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
Can we talk about how she only slept with you because you remind her of a member of a K-pop group?
It's probably not a good thing when it isn't even 6:30 and I've already drank an entire bottle of wine. By myself. I'm watching Spice World and I just bought 2 Spice Girls albums off itunes.
Make that 3 Spice Girls albums.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
