so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
Im so ripped right now that i just filled the almost empty bottle of choc syrup with milk and drank it straight out of the bottle. It was on pointttttt.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
I think not having bongs in close range is good for my academia
I literally have a bandage on my dick that's how bad she is at handjobs
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
By the power invested in me i promise you hot wedding sex at my wedding.
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Told him my main goal was to seduce the man and convince him to leave his wife for me. He didn't argue just asked me to let him know if I succeeded so he didn't waste anymore time not sleeping with the secretary at his office. I have an incredible boyfriend.
Hey, if a dude can't randomly belt out Whitney Houston tunes from time to time, is life really worth living??
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Can you please come in my room and pour water in my mouth? Too hungover to move. btw who is this guy in my bed? Can't see his face. Cute?
Randomize
