wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
So I just did the walk of shame at dunkin... A lady told me me I was really dressed up and I told her I was going to a luncheon.
the only difference between me and a prostitute was that i complained a lot more.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
I just walked by a party bus on my way to study. God hates me.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
Your resume just got faxed, I also modified it a bit and sent it to strip clubs...expect weird phone calls...
I raged so hard that I was so hungover today I threw up out of a car window going 50mph cause my parents didn't pull over quick enough ...sorry to the people behind us
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
Randomize
