like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
My STD test came back clean. I'd like to thank all the guys I've slept with, they made this possible. I want to say thanks to all my friends, for believing in me living up to the full slut potential. And last but not least, I'd like to thank alcohol. I wouldn't be who I am today w/out you. I feel like I need to frame this...
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
We decided to cut you off after you insisted on eating peanuts by the dumpster
today's workout consisted of me putting my fake in my sports bra and running to the liquor store.
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
The birthday girl is bringing her own barf bucket, it is going to be a good weekend.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
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