Just found my girlfriend's stash of animated Japanese porn
And to think, I actually considered breaking up with her
Can we talk about the cons of throwing up in the bathtub. there are no pros.
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
My roommate is on the phone with one of her friends trying to figure out how she threw up IN her pants. I'm not sure whether to burst out laughing or direct her towards Plan B.
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
The front desk girl just had that condescending welcome-home-from-your-walk-of-shame face on
It was probably because you set your bra on the couter while you found your ID...
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
ugh... fuck pirate breakfast. my head is like thirsty.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
When Ben was deep throating pickles last night I actually reconsidered our relationship
Well I didn't know she was a dominatrix...so I kind of just went with it
Brother gave me a harry potter philosophy book for xmas we need to get stoned and talk about this.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
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