We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
It was kinda weird being the boss
Did you feel like Tony Danza?
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
The lifeguard told us we had to move Mike before the tide came in when he passed out.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Hey. Me and my buddy are drunk. you wanna give us tattoos of the hawaiian punch guy we shall pay very well. Seriously dude. no bull shit.
Drinking, I should not. Got here I don't know. Still drunk, I am. At courtneys.
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
At one point I was counting his nipple hairs to calm myself down.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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