whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Canada just beat USA, the sad part they still need us to make money so who really won
I am more sore today than I was after my car wreck. Take it as a compliment that you bang harder than a semi-truck.
...and the foreplay consisted of me threatening to cut off his hand if he didn't remove it from my back.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
She drove all the way from Austin to have sex with me. I think it's a safe assumption my dick will have an easy life in college.
I ended up with bruises on the back of my knees. Tell me again how I did this?
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
I feel like I would find myself in so much trouble if I hadn't married my DD.
It will be like a scavenger hunt.. only we're looking for places to have sex.
FUCK YEAH PUPPY BOWL
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