ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Does it bother you that I left your underwear hanging in a tree at the zoo? i think the turtles are enjoying it.
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
omg. if hes just gonna get mad everytime i have sex with one of his "friends" then it was never gonna work out
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
If I won't even leave the house for sex tonight. I definetly not going out for anything else.
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
He was like the most intimidating looking guy you've seen in your life except he was really shittily doing the two step
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