But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
Drunk wheelbarrow races might make the top 10 list of dumb shit weve done. Especially considering all the broken glass around...
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
They are currently going door-to-door asking the neighbors to donate money for Cheez-Its and gift wrap. They asked me to stay back at the house to make another pitcher of margaritas.
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
The last thing I remember was doing a line in the shape of Texas
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
Seriously just told the plant the cheese Pringles are mine.
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
He showed up at 1:10AM covered in mud and vomit, wearing a headband that said victory in Japanese. I WANT PICS.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize