why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
Mom is telling us about the time she drank her own breast milk. Help.
I feel like im in a tornado of daylight savings, tequila and death
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
pregamed for the floor meeting. so stoned. i keep thinking my RA is shrinking.
Know of anyone who would be interested in trading weed for meatballs?
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
What's goes good with Everclear?
Pepto-Bismol and a sandwich.
I vaguely remember losing my underwear to 2 chicks in a bathroom. That drunk.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
Randomize
