3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
The best part was that when I woke up, I poked her with my dick to wake her up, and said, "Hi, I'm Alex. Nice to meet you". Shoulda seen the look on her face. Priceless.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
I feel like a really awesome person when i have to check my roof for things i've lost
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
Also I found and fixed my beer gun.
You're wearing a hospital gown and pearls. Let's reevaluate your life.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
I am sorry. I am also on acid.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
I may have just got motorboated by a male stripper who told me I should be a porn star and not a vet student.
She threw her burger out the car window last night. My vegan neighbors were not pleased but I’m pretty sure I saw a for sale sign go up on their lawn so I owe her one.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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