i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
The guy drove to our house at 6am to sell us weed. Now that's customer service.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
States back in the final four. Now our sunday night drinking has purpose. Sparty on baby.
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
We'll just play it by vagina and see where it leads us
I've never wanted to punch a 94 year old woman in the vagina, and then call her next of kin to tell them I just muff punched their Gam Gam until today.
Sex and sushi don't even sound good right now... I might be on my death bed. To my Liz, I leave my extensive movie collection and my drinking supplies. To Olive I leave my car. Cause every Scottish terrier needs a 2010 Camaro.
Goodnight Shia. Goodnight Moon.
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
Randomize
