community service is like the breakfast club... except we're all the criminal.
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
I show up hung over with mcdonalds. Why wouldn't he have sex with me? It's a fucking leap year...
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Hooked up to multiple episodes of Even Stevens last night. What the fuck.
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
How frowned upon is it to take your vibrator into the tanning bed...because Operation: dripping wet is in full swing and I have a busy schedule
You were hitting on girls while wearing the banana suit. When they rejected you you yelled "I gotta split anyway."
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
I take Paypal, cash, sexual favors, and roasted red potatoes with garlic as payment. You choose.
There's a dude wearing a banana suit at the house across the street....
Randomize
