Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
Why are you speaking in third person?
Because I'm so hungover that I don't even want to be myself anymore.
Just warning you now f you do not get intoxicated with me in front of the family on thanksgiving we are not related.
Last night was just one giant freudian slip.
You made out with EVERYBODY.
Can I just bleach my life?
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
In my defense, there are at least three ways to die doing that, and I'm still here. America, Fuck Yeah!
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Just a reminder- you dropped broccoli in my car and then felt bad for it and named him Henry
I know. I miss henry.
Randomize
