I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
There are empty beer cans all over and the go-kart is missing. I need it for my halloween costume.
I'm pretty sure this is how polyamorous relationships begin.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
Now go get drunk with your fam and get back into ur christmas groove. No time for gonnorhea
You kicked me our in the middle of a blizzard with a dead phone. I had to give my watch to a pizza delivery person to take me home. You owe me a gyro too.
I'm still, like... really stoked about not having any STDs
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
HOLY FUCK i just remembered we had bows and arrows and firecrackers last night
and flaming arrows and vodka
how did we not set your garage on fire
I'm kind of pissed I'm not hungover, that means I could have totally drank more last night.
lord you gonna make me abandon my soup for tasteful catboy nudes
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