Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
my mom just walked in on me furiously masturbating while reading twilight. needless to say, im officially out of the closet.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
the 5 D's of Dodgeball literally just saved my life
If a marine in My bed is not considered a valid excuse for missing class then I don't want to live in America anymore
I woke up and there was a mans ass as my screensaver...
You've changed since you got that strap on
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Knew i was going to puke. So i grabed a bowl out of the kitcken in the dark before bed...Ended up puking into a spaghetti strainer...
Only you would make Mario Party a contact sport.
And you owe me a new pair of switch controllers.
Randomize
