i really did not know you could catch crabs from a sofa until now
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
Girl in my class with fire painted on her face. I. need. that. weed.
whatever it's my dick and i'll put it wherever i want
I cant believe they held hands while getting simultaneous bjs
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
And also the fact that I woke up sandwiched between two gay men is probably fueling my day
Between this new vagisil cleaner and these cranberry vitamins, my vagina feels like a new women.
I also woke up in a bed soaked of pee and drunkenly lectured him on the dangers of chewing tobacco... weird night
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
I sent him nudes while he is at work because I am an evil human being.
Randomize
