Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
Am I a whore if I make out with a boy just so michelle can't?
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
It's official, the cities waste management does not recycle porn.
We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
It's a journey
And the destination is his penis?
Precisely.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
I haven't heard from him yet. He's either still asleep (which is entirely plausible..... There wasn't much sleeping happening last night) or he's robbing me blind. But I have renters insurance, so either way, I'm ok with it.
How am i even supposed to meet his daughter? "Hi, Claire, I hear we have so much in common, like we both love your Dad and also we're almost the same age."
Randomize
