were doing shots for every snowflake that hits the ground
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Dude she has the ugliest blow job face ever.
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
porn backed up onto portable hard disk, laptop charged, battery backup in place, two cases beer, handle of vodka, poptarts and beef jerky --- bring it sandy.
I feel like satan and death had a baby that took a shit that replaced my brain.
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
