Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I took an adderall but just ended up meticulously arranging my farmville for hours
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
you can only text me tonight if its in drake lyrics. thats the rule
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
