Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
I think I deserve the nobel peace prize for discovering that one should smoke before drinking instead of drinking before smoking.
Do they fuck in the end of "Lady and the Tramp" or am i just wasting my time
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
Everything about him screamed your future.
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
were facing impending death from north korea and were sitting here snorting tylenol to get high.....where did our lives go wrong?
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Yeah, great now I will be tampon girl
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Your slutty phase was the highlight of my year.
Randomize
