I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
haha my mom just sent us out to go to all of the hair cutting places to ask for hair because deer ate all our zuchini.. and we have to pee in a bucket all day cause deer hate urine. please tell me we are normal?
i cant lie to you.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
His grandma held his dogs so they wouldn't follow me out the door. It was like a whole new level added to my walk of shame.
I unknowingly motorboated my boyfriend's ex-gf last night. Yay me!
You kept flirting with some guy while I was throwing up on the sidewalk, and I screamed YOU DON'T LIKE MEN
If y'all wanna know how far the apple fell from the tree I'm sexting during Easter service. Mom would be so proud 😳
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
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