I just wanted to draw pictures of limp wieners on peoples doors and smash pictures of palm trees. That's it.
She took her shirt off and was broader than Dwight Howard.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
Its a sad when the highlight of your day is flicking a booger and actually getting it to stick to your computer monitor.
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
im eating kix cereal and taking shots by myself. please come hang out with me. im desperate
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
Whenever there is a ShotSki involved, I have no excuse but to drink, right? It's like a rule.
It made me think of you cause he just screamed "CAPTAIN PLANET" a lot and kicked people in the balls.
If we can't get laid at a bar crawl, we should just quit life.
Send me a pic of your kids to remind me why I have morals.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
Randomize
