I have no idea what i drank..i remember dancing and ass grabbing..u falling. Headbutts. Trying not to puke. And deja vu.
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
Just a heads up, i'm sleeping in te back seat of your car so don't be freaked out when you see me in the A.M.
The bad decision stars are too close to aligning to risk this tonight.
Do me a favor? If you get with him, please lick his abs. Someone has too they're just too beautiful not to.
There's a dead squirrel in the freezer. Is that what you stopped to get out of the road last night?
I can't figure out if I'm dying from all of the booze still in my system, or from the cement wall.
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
you said "how could you not want to hook up with me when I have these abs" and then proceeded to rip your shirt off in the middle of the bar. I'm pretty sure you were hammered.
JESUS
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Let me be the vehicle for you to live out your slutty half-gay dreams.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
I just Spray tanned myself while high as fuck its either going to look like a work of art or terrible graffiti
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