dude, best porn name ever, "the Hunt for Red Cocktober"
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
it's gonna be a chat room kind of night
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
I WAS a history major. I also WAS a functioning human being. Fuck gin.
After that song played in the club all he kept drunkenly saying was "Birdman goes brrrrrr"
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Add tweezing eyebrows to the list of things not to do while on adderol....
I got there and she was on her balcony drinking out of a bottle of vodka and smoking a cigar.
Randomize
