Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Also I just saw on facebook your sister is taking pole dancing lessons. Just a heads up.
We've got 2 weeks of college left-I want to feel like Gary Busey by graduation.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I dont care if your mom convinced you it should be an abstinent christmas. I did horribly on finals and i'm out of booze, so you will get over her and FUCK. ME. NOW.
When he grabbed my tits it felt like he was either giving me a mammogram or trying to pierce my nipples with his fingers.
I need to stop going to bars and yelling "I could be teaching your kids one day, bitches!"
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
I'd let you fuck my husband in the future, that's how much I love you
He left me alone in a hotel room my last night in town to go home to jerk off and watch TV. So yeah, I guess we're not really friends.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
I've started recycling nudes. Why should I take new pictures for every single man?
Randomize
