Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
Moved my bed either I'm a whore or every guy I have ever slept with hid condom wrappers under my bed
I'd do that. But we would need storm trooper helmets.
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I am too drunk to deal with your everything. Reread this everytime you feel the need to talk to me.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
If you got tons of KY ads on HuluPlus, it's because I hit "relevant" every time.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Note to self: remember to figure out whether melted cheese is a liquid when not stoned
... why is there baby oil , black socks and frozen hot dogs in the sink this morning ?
He tried to grab your ass, but he grabbed my hand cause I grabbed your ass first. I saved your ass..literally. Your welcome.
The waitress at the Denny's in usa remembered me from 2 years ago when we went at 4 in the morning plastered, wearing overalls and huge inflatable corona hats on our heads
Randomize
