words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Tim said I dropped my taco in a puddle and still ate it.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
Spending my graduation money on an abortion. Welcome to the real world.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
also, add "teaching boys to sext" to my charity work
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
He's scared I want a relationship? How does texting him at three am and sleeping with four of my exes symbolize that?
Excuse me while I gouge out my eyes.
In which case my work here is done.
Dashing through the vodka, in a tinder swiping rage, all the fuck boys get a no, laughing all the way.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
Randomize
