I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
So I had sex with him again. He's still got it. Not chlamydia, he got rid of that.
capris are just wrong
its like "what can i possible wear to make myself look short and fat? Oh I know!!"
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
Every one of her profile pictures looks like an ad for American Apparel. Of course she has syphilis.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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