i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
At what point did we decide It was a good idea t have a wheelbarrow race in the parking lot?
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
Oh wow. I almost tweeted #TweetFromTheBackOfACopCarTuesday but I didn't think it was that appropriate
I'm ready to take a few years of my life this weekend
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I'M SORRY THIS WAS SEXTING AND I MADE IT SERIOUS.
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
Randomize