did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures
well after we realized that his best friend and my twin sister were hooking up it was kind of an unsopken agreement that we would too
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
you kept telling us that in dog beers you only had one
He told me that a camel appeared out of nowhere and it told him to quit smoking...
The Ex's are trying to talk to the GF. Game face bro.
I like the odds of his and my children being professional athletes too. To support me in my old age, see I do think about the future.
if i do community service solely to impress a guy, everyone wins, right?
except your soul
Were you citizens arresting people again last night?
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Also, next time I go get a wax, I'm gonna ask the girl about the innie to outie ratio she sees on the daily.
Randomize
