don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
she called my cock the "semen sword" and then we invented a position called excalibur
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
lets talk about you, dubstep, and a bunny suit.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
We are trying to penis chicken awkward them out. But I think it's a gay wedding. Backfiring. Heavily.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
Im bringing my light up rubber ducky just in case we end up at a rave tonight. HE CHANGES COLOR!
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