I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
i've been thru my totinos phase. then after reading the ingredients and nutritional info i almost puked in my mouth. its like having the bastard child of pizza hut and mcdonalds invade your kitchen and start stabbing your digestive system.
It's very clear that i'm the girl sweating out four lokos at 2 in the afternoon at the gym
You are writing your college essay comparing yourself to Lady Gaga, Vladimir Putin, and Dale Earnhardt Jr. and you are worried about the conclusion sounding cheesy?
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
There is an alarming amount of urine in here.
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
Keywords: shitstorm, police, jail.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Randomize
