your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
The last thing I remember is you asking me how to grow french fries.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
He caught a squirrel with his bare hands twice. Where do you find these people?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
I'm going to give you the best blowjob of your life. And yes you can use my mom's printer.
all his sexual metaphors involve condiments, should I worry?
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
